I'm back!

WOW!!!! jeez loueez it's been FOREVER since i've blogged here. i can't remember why i stopped; i think life just got so crazy preparing for the wedding and then after the wedding i've been VERY caught up in married life. i didn't really expect it to take me so long to get back into the swing of my normal life...or maybe i should more accurately say i didn't think it'd take so long for my new life to become normal to me. i LOVE being married, it truly is awesome! sure, it's rough and there are problems i didn't expect to encounter, but i wouldn't take our decision to marry back for anything. its so amazing how quickly your perspective changes when you make a binding vow before God...i really did not expect for that to change so quickly. its like, one minute joel is, of course, love of my life and best friend, but then after stating those vows before everyone, even though i'd said them a hundred times to myself and in my head, its like WHAM! our lives are cemented together by God. its awesome, if not a little freaky. i went through a major stage of jealousy after marriage, where anyone and everyone who was close to joel made me angry; i didn't expect that either and it took me a while to even figure it out and put a stop to it. it was like i wanted to have the ONLY claim on him and his love, wanted to be the ONLY person in his life who had any right to him. very odd.

marriage isn't easy all the time...there's a lot of choosing to love the other, a lot of times when love does not come naturally at all. and let me tell you, there is NO better way to exercise the 1st (or is it 2nd?) corinthians 13 love passage then to just find yourself a spouse! it's quite amazing how similar the relationships between my husband and my God are. don't misunderstand; God is obviously SOOOOOOO much bigger and...vastly different. but there's just a lot you can learn about serving God when learning to love your husband (or wife) unconditionally.

So there's a sampling of marriage for you :)